my movie

Since this past summer, Jerod and I have gone through many trials- air conditioner broke, both of our laptops are toast, the Jeep's transmission went out, our indoor heating unit broke, someone to come fix it again $250, Jeep's flat tire $95, best friend got married and moved, and then there are always the in and out things in our daily life together as newly married couple.

And in case we wondered if God was trying to teach us something we began a study of James as a church. Convenient huh? It was just what we needed! And James talks about it right at the beginning; James do not let us miss it! "Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of many kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing." James 1:2-3

I've found that over the past several months I've been watching my own movie. As things are happening, God is allowing me to see Him change me and open my eyes to what He has for me almost as its happening. I see moments of sin and moments of joy, times were I need to be quiet, times were He's given me the strength to speak truth and the more I seek Him, the sooner I realize His work in my life. I play back the scenes and see where I went wrong, where God extended grace to me, where God convicted me, where He was evident in my life.

I've noticed this lately too- when I take my eyes off of other people and I ask the Lord to show me what I need to learn or see in a situation, then I'm able to see clearly and know more what it is I'm to do. If I walk around only praying for others and not for myself then I'm not practicing humility. I need Jesus. Trials in my life remind me of my great need for a Savior! We can not go at this life alone.

Even trials that go beyond money, trials with friends, family, coworkers, etc. Conflict is another reminder of my need for Jesus, especially conflict with those who do not love Jesus. Before I loved Jesus, He died for me, He loved me, He forgave me- Romans 5:8. How much more so ought we extend the grace that has been given to us with those who do not love Jesus? What mercy and love is this? How wonderful! When we see our great need for a Savior, we respond differently, we react differently.

I'm praying for the Lord to provide opportunities for me to share the Gospel, for the Holy Spirit to guide me in that process. I desire so much to be bold, but also to earn the write to speak into someones life and tell them the best news they will every hear! It is hard though- when you pray God responds. Am I ready for this? The Bible calls us to be ready to share the hope we have- 1 Peter 3:15. I need to be ready; I need to feed myself, as Pastor Tyler says.

"Although I am less than the least of all of God’s people, this grace was given to me: to preach to the gentiles the unsearchable riches of Christ." Ephesians 3:8

dmj.

{a}dvent

⁶ For to us a child is born, to us a son is given; and the government shall be upon his shoulder, and his name shall be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.

⁷ Of the increase of his government and of peace there will be no end on the throne of David and over his kingdom, to establish it and to uphold it with justice and with righteousness from this time forth and forevermore. The zeal of the LORD of hosts will do this.

Isaiah 9:6-7

Advent, a time to looking forward of what is to come. This Advent season, Pastor Tyler has been focusing on the names of Jesus from Isaiah 9- Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace. That has got to be one of the great mysteries of our faith, that God could send Jesus as a baby and He could be all those things, even as an infant. It is mysterious and hopeful all at the same time. Christ had to grow and learn like a human, but He still had many of the qualities of God.

God's gift to us, salvation began as an infant. Jesus was not what the people at the time were looking for, He wasn't the WARRIOR, sword drawn, ready to do physical battle. Jesus spent His life ministering to the HEART of the people. What the Jewish people had been longing for, looking for and praying for was finally there and sadly so many of them missed it.

I'm reminded of my study of the Patriarchs by Beth Moore. She pointed out that many of the events in the Old Testament pointed to the coming Messiah. A perfect example is Abraham and Issac. God asked a great thing of Abraham- take the son I gave you and sacrifice him. What?! Abraham obediently took Issac. I love the verse in Hebrews.

¹⁷By faith Abraham, when he was tested, offered up Isaac, and he who had received the promises was in the act of offering up his only son, ¹⁸ of whom it was said, "Through Isaac shall your offspring be named." ¹⁹He considered that God was able even to raise him from the dead, from which, figuratively speaking, he did receive him back.

Abraham believed that God not only kept His promises but could bring Issac back to life to do it! At what seems like the last minute, God provides a suitable sacrifice for Abraham. This points to the coming of Christ. Jesus would atone for the sins of the world. Jesus would take our place so we do not have to live a life separated from Him.

I love the song that was sung at Vintage 21 yesterday at the 11:30am service. I was back in the kids area checking my email and these words were sung- "No greater love story heaven could tell, God's gift of redemption, Emmanuel." Such true words.

What a wonderful reminded of the gift we've been given through Christ Jesus.

dmj.

EASY Weeknight Dinner

Unfortunately I do not have a picture of this awesome meal, but it was good, I promise! Every other Monday night James and Echo come over to our house for supper and I get to cook! And I have a think for cooking pork.

I've found that if I go to Harris Teeter once a week, I can always find something on sale. I walked in a couple Monday's ago when I was shopping for one of my clients and found that marinated pork tenderloins were on sale with a $4.00 of sticker. I picked up two and they were only $4.99 each! This is seriously one of my favorite things to eat! It is this simple, put the pork loin in the center of a large baking dish, then put whatever vegetables or potatoes you want around it. I put the oven on 375 degrees and leave it all in the oven for about an hour. I know most recipes have you brown the pork or whatever roast you're using on each side, then stick it in the over with the veggies, but I don't do that. Why? Because I don't want to wash another dish that's why!

Baked Pork Tenderloin with Butternut Squash, Apples and Onions
Note: I do not really know what spices go with what, so I usually just use what I have. I had rosemary on hand so that's what I chopped up and used. I'm sure sage would be awesome though! I love that with pork and apples!

1 Pork Tenderloin in the package, marinated or not
Top half of butternut squash, peeled, and cut into 2in. by 1/2 inc strips
2 apples, peeled and chopped about 1in. pieces
2 onions, peeled and cut into quarters
Whatever herb you have on hand chopped
Olive oil
Salt and pepper

Preheat oven to 375 degrees.
Take baking dish and drizzle olive oil on the bottom. Place pork on top and sprinkle both sides with salt and pepper. Place veggies on all sides of the pork and drizzle with salt pepper and olive oil. Then sprinkle the herbs on top of the pork or all over, whatever. It will be good :-)

Bake for an hour. Check on everything about half way. Move the veggies around. At an hour of cooking time check the temperature of the pork. One good rule of thumb is to see if the juices are running clear. But if you have a meat thermometer, the internal temperature should be about 160 degrees for a nice juicy, just cooked through, pink. That's the way Jerod likes it.

Serve with some kind of carb if you didn't bake one with the pork. We like rice or crusty bread.

Enjoy!

dmj.

Soup Weather

The weather today couldn't make up its mind! It was warm this morning, drizzled, poured and then was damp for the rest of the day. The wind was blowing leaves across the path at Lake Johnson. But it was a beautiful day to run. The trees are finally all different shades- reds, yellows, and oranges. I had butternut squash left over from making dinner yesterday so I decided it was a soup kinda day! I went to the farmer's market on Monday and got the butternut squash, onions and a giant bag of apples. I love going during the week; its quieter because there are way less people. I was pleased because the soup was a hit with Jerod, even with NO MEAT!

Thanx to a little help from Epicurious, dinner was delicious!

Butternut Squash Soup topped and Cider Cream w/ Toasted Whole Wheat Baguette
Adapted from Epicurious

Notes: I only had the bottom half of my 3 lb butternut squash left, so I altered the amount of liquid (2 cups vegetable stock, 1 cup water, 1 cup spiced cider). If you want to make one full 3 lb butternut squash, use 4 cups stock. I also made my version vegetarian, because all I had open was vegetable stock, so you can totally use chicken instead. I'm that kind of cook, if I don't have it, I make it up with something else or leave it out! If you have what their recipe calls for on hand then use it, my version is what I had in the house. If you only have so much stock, don't hesitate to substitute for 1 C water.

Celery root? I LOVE it. My mom got me into using it. It is expensive though so usually one of us gets it and we split it. It smells like celery, but tastes milder in my opinion.

Butternut squash does not play games. Make sure you have a good, sharp knife to cut these bad boys. First time I tried to make them I bought one that was too big, so it was tough and it was before Jerod and I bought our good knives. Talk about a workout just to peel a vegetable! (I want these next!)

4 tbsp organic unsalted butter
1 3lb butternut squash, peeled, and cut into 1/2 in cubes
1 onion, chopped
2 stalks celery, chopped
1/2 C celery root, chopped
salt, pepper
2 gala apples, cored, peeled, chopped
1 1/2 tsp dried thyme
1/2 tsp dried sage
1 C Trader Joe's spiced cider
5 C vegetable broth

Several spoonfuls of sour cream (depends on how many people your serving)
Couple splashes of spiced cider



Heat butter on medium-high heat in a large heavy pot. Toss in butternut squash, onion, celery and celery root. Cook, stirring and scrapping the bits of the bottom for 10 min, long enough for squash to soften. Season with salt and pepper. Add apples and spices and stir. Then add broth and cider. Bring to a boil. Then turn heat to medium-low to simmer. Let simmer for about 30 min.



Once cooked, take the soup, working in batches if you need to, and blend in a food processor or blender. Pour back into the pot. You can leave the soup on the stove till you are ready to warm for supper time or serve immediately.



Take the sour cream and cider and stir up in a bowl. Put on the table for people to dollop on top of their soup!

While the soup was heating back up for supper, I cut the baguette I had into slices. I warmed up a slice of butter on medium heat in our cast iron skillet. I crisped the bread up really good! There is just something about bread and warm butter, yum! I served that along side the soup.



Enjoy! Merlin dog and I are going to go to bed and wait for Jerod to get home!

dmj.

T is for [tattoo]

I never thought that one day I would actually get one, but last Monday night Jerod and I went to Femme Fatale Tattoos in Raleigh. The tattoo shop is owned by Blair who is fabulous! She also has a sweet dog named Sumi (ink in Japanese) who hangs out with her in the shop! I really did not want to get a tattoo from a big burly man, and on our date night to the Cup a Joe in the same shopping center, we decided to walk in a check out her shop! We met Blair's brother and just started talk about what we wanted. She sketched two different designs for me and I loved both, so Jerod was the tie breaker. We decided to get the birds I wanted filled in instead of only an outline.

Getting the actual tattoo felt NOTHING like I thought it would. It was painful during certain parts of my back but not all. Jerod and Blair reminded me not to tense up and they were right! The more relaxed it let my arms and back get, the less it hurt.

After it was all done it felt like a bad sunburn. The funniest thing was, even before I sat down for Blair to start, I stated sweating. I'm talking like, dripping sweat from my arm pits. I have no clue why?! It was very strange. But Blair says that happens, but I couldn't find anything in my Google search about it.

I was sad because Nicole and I can't get the pictures from that night off her memory card! So these are what I have from Jerod's camera. My skin has healed really well and I have had almost no scabbing. Right after my tattoo was finished, I leaked a little plasma from my red bird and it looked I was bleeding right out of my back. But that stopped really soon too. Since that Monday I just put lotion on it twice a day and no problems!





I originally found several tattoos with birds that I really liked. I've been thinking about getting a tattoo for a little over 3 years now, but I never found anything I really wanted to put permanently on my body! That's a big commitment!

Lately I've been very aware of what God has brought me from-- out of a struggle with fear, anxiety and guilt. I have lived free from that stronghold for several years now. Matthew 6:26 says, "Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow, nor reap nor gather up in barns, and yet your Heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? " I love that verse. When I'm anxious, nervous or fearful I remember that I'm a daughter of God. I'm not defined by what other people think, my failure or my sin. Its freeing.

So now that's permanently on me! And I love the reminder.

Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow, nor reap nor gather up in barns, and yet your Heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? matthew 6:26

dmj.

Heat is overrated.

So again our heat pump is not working.... and the dog and I are freezin! It is 64 degrees in the house and well, needless to say when it starts working again I'll have a whole new appreciation.

I need to learn how to build a fire so when Jerod is not home I can do it myself. It'll be very pioneer women. Imagine, people had to do this all the time if they wanted heat. It didn't just get pumped into their house. Man, I'm thankful I live in 2010!!

Where does my value lie? Sure isn't in out heat pump. Or our ability to spend money on whatever I want, because Jerod and I don't have $2,000 laying around to replace the unit again.

All I can seem to do right now is laugh. I'm confident God has even this under control. But I still struggle. My idea of God providing looks different, I won't lie. Lord, can we win the $23 million lottery? Can we inherit $20,000? In my mind I see all we could do with that money, pay of the last ac unit, pay off Jerod's student loans, have more than $500 in savings. But I see my own heart yet again. I'm under the misconception that money will satisfy me. If we had this or that, or didn't have to worry about money-- THEN I would be satisfied.

I'm broken over the state of my own heart. God is not limited by money! I'm humbled by that truth! We have what we need right now and no more.

Well I'm off to pack. J and I are going to the OBX to visit with his dad and Barbara. Have a lot to do!

dmj.

God's {faithfulness}

But if we hope for what we do not have, we wait for it patiently -Romans 8:25

Was looking through my list of drafts, things I've never posted. Sometimes I use blogger as a way to put things I am thinking down with no intention of actually posting them. As I was looking through I saw that I saved the verse in bold above. And it is VERY fitting for my life right now. I am again in a season of waiting.

This season of waiting has to do with nursing school at Wake Tech. I am an alternate for the spring class. I received the letter in the mail two weeks ago. I cried when I showed it to Jerod because I feel one step closer to what I want to do but not quite there! Orientation was this past Friday from 1pm-5pm. I am number 30 on the alternate list and last semester they accepted 35 alternates.

Jerod and I were talking about when we have children, we'd like to give them all their options. I had no idea NC had great RN programs at their community colleges. I had no idea what it looked like to transfer to another school, I had no idea there was anything outside of a 4 year university and I had no idea how to support myself enough to purse the degree I wanted.

But now as I wait I'm reminded of this verse in James. You want something but don't get it. You kill and covet, but you cannot have what you want. You quarrel and fight. You do not have, because you do not ask God. James 4:2. For the longest time I just went around desiring to pursue nursing. But even after I set my mind to start pursuing it, I never sat down and asked God. I just assumed He knew. Which is true. God does know the desires of our heart. But like little children (Matthew 18:13), we are to be totally dependent on God. Children depend on their parents, their parents love them and provide for them.

I am encouraged by the following verses in Romans.

Romans 8: 26-28

Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit itself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words. And he who searches hearts knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will or God. And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to His purpose.

I have to submit this desire to God. No matter what, He'll do what is ultimately best for me and what will bring Him the most glory. I know God always shows up and whether God grants me favor in this area by me getting into nursing this semester, or something else, I know and trust God is faithful-- Psalm 33:4-- The word of the LORD is upright, all His work is done in faithfulness.

Hope this brings encouragement. Our God is faithful! He promises that all things will work out for God for those who are called according to His purpose. Do you believe that? I do. I see His faithfulness in my life. Romans 5:8 reminds us-- but God who shows His love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

dmj.

Merlin

See Merlin run. See Jerod run, but not as fast as Merlin!



Pictures for no reason other than we think he's a super cute dog.

And maybe I watched Marley and Me last night and I got a little sad that one day Merlin would not be with us. And maybe I cried when Marley died. Don't judge. I love my dog.

Our dog has a backpack, yes, we're those people.


I love these:

I talk to him when I'm lonesome like; and I'm sure he understands. When he looks at me so attentively, and gently licks my hands; then he rubs his nose on my tailored clothes, but I never say naught thereat. For the good Lord knows I can buy more clothes, but never a friend like that.
{W. Dayton Wedgefarth}

Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing right in your ear.
{Dave Barry}



Merlin all ready for a r-u-n.


dmj.

Stuffed 8-Ball Zucchini

Remember those cute zucchini from the last post? Well, I made em' last night for supper! Turned out great! And you can do it too! So easy. Really the idea is basic, almost like making a meatloaf or a meatball and packaging it a little different. Cooking is a mixture of problem solving, creativity and for me, is very therapeutic. I feel relaxed in the kitchen and I love eating with people! Spending time eating a meal together with Jerod, or a friend or C-group-- there is nothing better. Everyone slows down for a bit and its a time to talk and catch up.

I hope you enjoy these zucchini. I do not know how much longer they will be at the NC Farmer's Market. I got giddy when I saw them! You can easily use this stuffing for peppers too! We tried another wine from Trader Joe's and toasted slice of bread! Delicious :-)


Stuffed 8-Ball Zucchini
I adapted the recipe from Tartelette. I did it with what I had in the house.

4 8-ball zucchini (if you get 6 you can use 1lb. of meat)
2 tbsp olive oil
1/2 onion, minced
1/2 C celery plus leafy bits from the center of the stalk, minced
2 garlic cloves, minced
2/3 lb. ground beef
1 C button mushrooms, chopped
2 yellow tomatoes, chopped
1 C cooked white rice
2 tbsp basil, chopped
1 tbsp dried oregano

Get your baking dish, butter the bottom. Set aside.

In a cast iron skillet heat oil on medium heat. Saute garlic, onion and celery for a couple of minutes, till they're a little soft. Add your beef and brown.



Add mushrooms and tomatoes.





After they've cooked for a bit add your rice. Th mushrooms and tomatoes let off a good amount of water so the rice helps to soak it all up!

While this is cooking you can start to prep your zucchini! Cut the tops off (not too far down, for maximum stuffing space). I used a melon baller, all Jerod's idea, and it worked out great!



Do this too all of them. And in the middle of hollowing out your zucchini, give your mixture a good stir. Depending on the amount of liquid, determine whether or not to take it off the heat and let it cool. Then finish hollowing our zucchini.

Preheat your over to 350 degrees. Then stuff em'!



Take your baking sheet and I pour a little bit of tomato sauce with zucchini (noticing a theme? I really like zucchini.) on the bottom.
You do not have to do this, you could have the pan buttered and only add the remaining meat mixture if you have any.



Then I topped that with my leftover meat mixture.


I put my zucchini on top and popped it in the oven!


Bake for 15 with the tops on. Take the tops off, grate some Parmesan cheese on top and then bake for another 15 minutes.

Enjoy! We did:



dmj.

October, welcome!

I'm sitting in my kitchen, the blinds up, all the windows in the house open, watching the leaves blow across our parking lot, I'm filled with a sense of joy. Fall has finally arrived and to say I'm thankful is an understatement. I've been waiting, not very patiently for the cool breeze, to cook soup, bake apple pie and wear tights. I had a hard time letting go of the colder months last year; when spring came I was sad and complained. I was so not ready to let go that I made another pot of potato soup; it didn't get eaten. Once spring comes it North Carolina, it just gets HOT. No middle ground, not in this state.



The fall always means time with family is close by. My brother's birthday is today, Thanksgiving and Christmas are right around the corner. I'm looking forward to time with family and friends. I'm also looking forward to time spent in the kitchen, cooking soup and doing things with apples.

The NC Farmer's Market was beautiful today. Not as many people as a Saturday morning. I'm starting to see less and less of the fruit and vegetables I've been enjoying all summer as we're moving into colder weather. I was thankful though because there were still small eggplants, zucchini, basil and yellow tomatoes. While I have a love of all tomatoes, the yellow ones have been my favorite this year, but they were only around for 3 weeks. I nabbed 5 today, its the first time in a month I've seen them. These are beautiful medium sized, round, still have dirt on em' and believe it or not, taste a little peppery. I'm thinking maybe sliced thin on a pizza tonight or a tomato sandwich with mayonnaise?

I can always count on having "company" while I'm in the kitchen, Merlin is never far away - ever hopeful - wedged between my legs and the cabinet doors. He waits patiently for me drop something on the floor or to put something in his food bowl. And sometimes if he is looking really cute, I'll slip him something, a piece of peach perhaps?

*Merlin - "Do you need help? Or do you want to give me a piece of the meat your making meatballs with?"


In the fall I tend to miss living in Europe the most. Less tourists are visiting my favorite places, you get to wear your winter clothes, (they have after all been lonely in the Tupperware container in the attic all these months) and Christmas markets start.

*Look what I found! 8-ball zucchini- going to stuff them
with ground beef mixture. Small, round, green, and hopefully
they'll be delicious.


*Look at the gorgeous color of these!
I made them into a sauce with tomatoes- to eat with rice.


But, soon the Farmer's Market will be devoid of my summer favorites- eggplants, varieties of tomatoes, fresh herbs and fruit like peaches and plums. They are making way for apples, pears and beets. I'm going to have to get a little more creative, pretty soon it will be greens and sweet potatoes!

Apple pie anyone?

dmj.

happy burfday jerod!

Last Tuesday Jerod turned 27!



We celebrated the day of with cooking a meal together and eating with Nicole and Charles. We made venison, with a feta sauce, basic tomato sauce with zucchini and brown rice spiral pasta.



celebrating jerod:
1. He loves God
2. While we were getting to know one another and then while we were dating, he pursued me and loved me well. We did not do everything perfect, but he desired to guard my heart and I always knew where I stood: he loved me and the end goal was marriage.
3. Now that we are married, even when we are not communicating well or not seeing eye-to-eye he labors to make our relationship better, and I do not always in the moment give him credit for that.
4. He fixes things well, especially since I am frequently breaking things.
5. He fights for our Sabbath and our date night.
6. He has a good sense of humor, cliche yes, but so important. Sometimes his humor brings perspective.

Jerod is a wonderful man, who loves God and I'm so thankful to be married to him! I would not want to be anywhere else!

dmj.

Pizza with Leftovers

This pizza was AWESOME. I made it with the left over rib meat from Jerod's lunch at The Pit. If you have not been there, you should go. Like every other Empire Eats Restaurant I've been to in Raleigh, it is good eatin! So far we've tried all but Sitti, which is Lebanese cuisine.

(Note: This was the first time I have ever tried to make homemade pizza dough. I usually get the one from Trader Joe's, but I was never happy with it.)



The dough recipe I used is from a favorite blog of mine called Smitten Kitchen. She makes a really simple homemade pizza. Here are some of her tips for pizza making that really helped me.

What went wrong? It turned out pretty well, BUT I think it would have turned out better if I had used actual plastic wrap and NOT aluminum foil. I do not think it trapped the air in the bowl, and hindered the dough from rising to its full potential. I also did not really knead the dough as much as I should have. I really did not know what it meant. But this is a great video I found later that I'll be using next time.
What went well? Well it tasted great, and I will never cook pizza unless I use the broiler EVER AGAIN. Despite my fear the dough did not turn out, it cooked up beautifully under the broiler. I may actually give TJ's dough another go, and see if this technique works. Turning on the broiler 10+ minutes before using it, made a big difference.

Pizza with Leftovers

1 C Monterey Jack cheese
1/2 Yellow Onion, sliced thin
1 Recipe Homemade BBQ sauce
Leftover meat off pork ribs, about 1 C, cut up smaller/shredded
1 Recipe Homemade pizza dough (recipe bellow) or store bought

Make the dough:

3/4 C whole-wheat flour
3/4 C all purpose flour (plus more for your counter)
1 teaspoon salt
3/4 teaspoon active dry yeast
1/2 cup warm water, you do not want to kill your yeast
1 tablespoon olive oil (plus more for your bowl)
Corn meal

Baking pan
Plastic wrap

(Note about how I cook: I like to get all my ingredients out and measured for the most part before I start actually doing anything.)

PREP #1: lightly flour your work space, and have extra flour handy.
MIX: In a bowl, place flour, salt and yeast; then add water and olive oil. I used a wooden spoon to gather all ingredients together in a nice ball.
KNEAD: Dump your ball our onto your prepped work space and knead the dough for several minutes. (very important step)
RISING: I put a drop of olive oil in the bowl I used earlier, and rubbed it all over. Then, I put the dough back in the bowl. As mentioned before I put aluminum foil but you should put plastic wrap. Leave it for an hour.
Place dough back on your floured work space, press the dough with your hands and roll back into a ball. Place back under the plastic wrap and leave it along for another 20 min.
PREP #2: Prep all your pizza topping ingredients. And turn on your broiler.
ROLL: Put a little corn meal down on the baking sheet. Then roll out the dough. You will end up making a thin crust pizza with this recipe. Place your rolled out dough on your baking sheet.
I'm sure you could double it to feed more people or to have a thicker crust?
INGREDIENTS: Spread out BBQ sauce on the dough, spread onions out, shredded rib meat, then lastly, spread out shredded cheese over the top.
BROIL: I think I had it in the oven for about 10 minutes.

Everything was hot and crusty... yum! Crusty cheese is one of my favorite things :) The crust was cooked all the way through and not soggy! I wish I had a picture for you but before we thought about it, we had eaten it all! All in all I would call it a semi-success but worth trying again to perfect it! What a great date night this would make though? I always love cooking with Jerod. You can also adapt this in anyway. What I love about cooking is how the better you get, you don't need to panic when you do not have a particular ingredient, you take the basic techniques you know and build on them. Enjoy!

dmj.

Did I pass Lord?

The end of this past week and into the weekend I had the suspicion that God might be testing me. I've been learning a lot about testing as I've been doing the Patriarch study by Beth Moore. Some tests seem extreme, like when God tested Abraham. God seems to go after the thing/things that we love the most. And out tests have our name on them. God puts out "loves" out on the table and forces the issue with us. Have you really given this over to me? Do you really love me more than ___?

In Genesis 22:1-2 God tests Abraham -->

"After these things God tested Abraham and said to him, 'Abraham!' And he said, 'Here I am.' He said, 'Take you son, your only son Isaac, whom you love , and go to the land of Moriah, and offer him there as a burnt offering on one of the mountains of which I shall tell you.'"

Did Abraham really love God above all else? Even more than the son God provided him that supposedly would be the father of many? But last minute, right before Abraham was about to sacrifice his only son, God provided a ram to take Isaac's place!

Beth Moore points out that throughout Genesis, God is teaching Abraham so he can teach. He provided a way for Abraham to know acceptable sacrifices- the Law. Here he could be foreshadowing the Gospel!

I love this story because it is a reminder; what do I value, what do I love, what have I/have I not given to God? I have finally admitted to myself, Jerod, my family and a close friend, that I do want a baby. But I also know Jerod and I have submitted a plan before the Lord: we're naturally family planning, want to start trying to have kids in about 3 years, but if it happens earlier than it does. This desire is more something I think about when I'm alone, its a quieter desire and sin issue in my life- not obvious to others. But this weekend I wonder if God was testing me... I've told other people I've given it over to God but have I really?

I was 4 days late and my cycle keeps getting longer and longer. But I took a pregnancy test and I was not pregnant. But being that late my mind started to wander, to think, to dream about what it would mean if I was. And I had to spend some serious time giving over my desires and my hopes.

I love in the story of Abraham, God provided for Abraham. And I know God has provided for me as well. No only do I feel peace about God's provision and plan in my life, other fears I had were addressed and I have peace. I want to live free of fear or anxiety. I believe God has a plan bigger than I can see, I want to see when God tests me and see His provision in my life.

dmj.

what's goin on in the Johnson house and then some.

Hello September!

{life}
Can you believe it is already September? This year has gone by so fast. I feel like I have not gotten everything done that I set out to do. But things have been going well.

Jerod started back with teaching school at Enloe HS. He says so far things have been going well, his potentially tougher group of kids is first thing in the morning. MUCH better than last year when he has them the last two period of the day when everyone, including Jerod, was tired and ready to go home.

I started school back up but I really never stopped. I took Microbiology over the summer with Ms. Dix and now I'm in Pathophysiology for fall semester. I work with two clients every week who I love dearly. I consider the one women my friend. She is older, sweet and understanding. Often we just sit an talk for a while.

v21 {kids}
Vintage 21 is starting a new campus! We are doing it right down the street at 110 S. East St. It is another church but we are using their building in the mornings. Ethan Perkins describes it as a "church in a box" which makes sense. Everything will have to be set up and then later taken down. I am nervous because I do not have as many volunteers as I would like, but I remind myself that God is faithful! He provides what we need, when we need it. Praise that within a couple days I now have 5 people who are interested! So I'll be praying for favor over the next several months. I desire that God would show up and make Himself known. I want to glorify Him and show people Jesus.

what's on my {heart} lately
Pastor Tyler has been teaching us out of Galatians. Paul rebukes the Galatians because instead of living free in Christ, they are still finding their value, morality and hope in the law, not Christ! The Galatians where finding their identity in the wrong place. And how quickly we forget what Christ has done for us? Paul says in Galatians 3: 1, "O foolish Galatians! Who has bewitched you? It was before your eyes that Jesus Christ was publicly portrayed as crucified". They saw Christ die with their own eyes! I know the work Christ has done in my life, that through now power of my own, in total depravity, Christ sought me out and saved me from death. But how quickly do I forget?! Too quickly sometimes. I see this the most when I am dealing with people. I get impatient, intolerant, I'm not understanding. I have to give mercy and patience just like I was given.

Our salvation comes from faith in God, accepting that Christ came to fulfill the law, fulfill the covenant God made. I have been doing a Bible study with some of the women in my community group, Marsha and Nicole. We are studying the Patriarchs (Abraham, Isaac and Jacob) my Beth Moore. I love how we see Paul reminding the Galatians that Abraham was counted righteous because he believed (Genesis 15:6, Romans 4:3, Galatians 3:6, James 2:23). That was all he had to do. Believe God was who He said He was and He was going to take care of business.

I do not want to ever be foolish and believe things that are untrue about God or lead others astray because I am living according to the law, doing good deeds, looking good on the outside, but being unchanged, ugly and dead on the inside! I want to find my freedom in Christ.

dmj.

a [cheap] dinner

Hello! It's been a while! Things have been rather crazy in the Johnson household this past month. But things are slowing down and I am thankful. Last night Jerod and I hung out and ate at home and it turned out so well I thought I would share it with you! And it was also a pretty cheap meal, which is always good for my food budget.


Oven Baked BBQ Chicken Leg Quarters
adapted from the hungry mouse
2-4 BBQ chicken leg quarters ($2.62/2 @ Trader Joe's)
s and p (pantry staple)
a little canola oil (pantry staple), or some non-stick spray
parsley, chopped ($1.79/bunch @ Harris Teeter)
BBQ sauce from store or homemade

Honey BBQ Sauce
2 good squirts ketchup
2 good squirts honey
Splash or two of soy sauce
Splash of apple cider vinegar
1 tsp canola oil
Squirt of yellow mustard
2 tbsp brown sugar
1 garlic clove, chopped
WHISK: Put this in a small bowl and whisk it up!
*You can make more or less depending on how much chicken you have, for just the two of us I made less. Sorry my directions for this are not technical. You can taste it and figure out what you like.
*You can always just buy it too! But I do not like that everyone seems to have hydrogenated oil in it. I did see that Trader Joe's has one with out it. I think it was $3.00 through and I didn't want to spend the money on it.

OVEN: 375 degree F
SEAR: take frying pan, and heat small amount of oil or spray on HIGH heat. When the pan is hot place chicken in the pan and let cook for a few minutes, you can lift it up and check the color, I usually pull them off when they're a nice brown color. The pan will smoke and if you use oil, may pop so be careful. I always burn my fingers.
COOK: Place chicken on a rack in a roasting pan on on a sheet pan. Coat the meat with some sauce and cook for 15 minutes. Pull out rack and coat them again. Then let cook undisturbed for 30 minutes. In my oven that time will cook it all the way through. If you are unsure go another 5 minutes or use a meat thermometer.
SERVE: I like to serve the chicken with parsley on top in stead of cilantro because I like it better.

Boiled Carrots w/ Parsley and Butter

I use 1/2 the bag of small carrots so Jerod can have some for lunch the next day
(I believe these are $1.89 @ Trader Joe's, even cheaper would be the bag of regular carrots for $0.89, more work but cheaper)
parsley, chopped
1/2 tbsp real butter (pantry staple)

BOIL: boil water in a medium sauce pan (maybe 3 C), after water is boiling drop in carrots and let cook until they are as tender as you like them, about 10 minutes
DRAIN: drain the carrots and place back in the sauce pan, probably on a different burner so you don't burn the butter
FINISH: place drained carrots back in sauce pan with butter, place burner on med-lo. Let the carrots hang out in the butter for a little bit (~5 min) then add parsley and stir. Serve!

You can serve this with rice, oven roasted sweet potato or regular potato fries, buttered pasta, couscous, bread whatever you want really. I just love carbs!

Hope you enjoy! I made this last night and Jerod and I always really like it. Another nice thing is Jerod has lunch the next day. I put rice, carrots and some extra meat in a pyrex and he was set!

hope you enjoy.

dmj.

Now what?

I hung out with Claire Roberts and her kiddos this past Friday. She was asking about our first year of marriage and it got me thinking! I had not really sat down and thought about it. Has it been good? What have we done? Have we grown over this past year? I have been in a funk now for the past month at least and I wonder if it's because we are changing. Not changing in a bad way, but settling in to {married life}?

I've found myself over the past several months feeling anxious and looking for the next thing. Claire mentioned she likes to have something to look forward to and I think I'm the same way. Before you are married you are looking to get a boyfriend. Then you get the boyfriend and you are thinking, when are we going to get engaged? Then you get engaged and you plan a wedding! You plan and plan, get excited and then once you are married and go on your honeymoon, real life begins to happen. Nothing major to plan, no major event your looking forward to. You're going to work or school (at least for me) every day. You come home cook dinner. You have those things, like C-group or church, you do every week. All of these things are good and I love them, but I keep finding myself asking, now what?

I believe the Lord is quietly saying to me wait, learn, watch, pray, seek me. It doesn't sound super exciting at first. I'm supposed to sit around waiting? I sense J and I are supposed to be preparing for something, and of course only God can know the what, when, where, and how. I have a feeling the Lord is yet again teaching me patience and contentment. Those things in our lives that keep us from worship and keep us in bondage God goes after with a vengeance. Which is why I'm not surprised I'm continuing to have to learn this lesson over and over. My goal is to memorize Philippians 4:11-13 this week. If Paul can be content in prison, then I should be able to be content in the place God has brought me.

dmj.

Jerod's hummus

Thought I would share another awesome hummus recipe! I found it here. Thanx Emeril!

I made a couple changes and it turned out great. I love it even more than the last one I made! It is also the kind of hummus Jerod will eat so needless to say I'll probably make this one more :-)

1 can chickpeas
1 roasted red pepper
1 clove garlic
1/2 C tahini
juice from 1/2 a lemon
2 tbsp water

1/2 tsp salt
1/4 tsp cumin
1/4 tsp paprika
1/8 tsp black pepper

I didn't bother mincing or chopping anything. I was lazy and let my food processor do ALL the work :-)
That's why I love it! It keeps about a week.

dmj.

{learning}

Learning dependence on God is hard when you are an adult. Culture says: I'm supposed to be independent. Take care of myself. I'm supposed to look out for myself. Work had to provide for myself. What I have is mine because I earned it, worked hard for it. It is easy to give into this mentality and not believe truth: that all I have is a gift from God; nothing is mine.

I make God smaller than He is, and I do not even mean to do it; I diminish His power in my life. How quickly I forget that I'm taken care of?! God's got this. All my questions, all my desires, all my worries and all my fears are already known by God. Could my anxiety be because I'm not telling God, even if He already knows the desires of my heart? We are supposed to come to God like little children, dependent for our every need (Mark 10:15). Thankful, because He has provided all we need.

Today I'm feeling content and thankful. I think I'm starting to live more in the now and not always looking for what is ahead, missing what God is providing for me now. It's allowing me to take pleasure in these little joys in life. Corney? Maybe, but I'm okay with that. I'm called to not worry. Philippians 4:6-7 says, do not be anxious about anything, but by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your heart and your mind in Christ Jesus.

Updates on our life right now:

*I'm very thankful I have Jerod home for three weeks! He is all done with teaching, and he'll start teaching Pre-calculus at Enloe sometime in early July. Yesterday we just hung out, ate together and even played some XBox 360 before I went to class.

*My brother graduated from HS! And this August he'll be a student at NC State in the college of Engineering! Go Wolfpack!

*Surprisingly, running is getting easier and easier!! You may not believe me but I swear it is true :-)

*Merlin update: When we run he still thinks he has to pee on every other bush... "This ones mine! and this ones mine too!" But he looks so cute when he trots next to me, mouth open, tongue hanging out the side. Run's usually involve at least one attempt at attacking a squirrel and several attempts at attacking birds! I often wonder what he might do if he actually got a hold of one. Everyone is telling us he looks bigger and I am starting to believe them. His legs are longer and he's taking up more space than before. He new favorite pastime is sleeping under just about anything-- our bed, coffee table, other people's coffee table's, dining room table's, etc.

A while back he jumped up and knocked a bird down in the backyard. I couldn't get my self to pick up the bird dying next to the air conditioning unit. So, I waiting till Jerod got home to get rid of the now dead bird. Merlin has an incredible memory. Every so often he would go to the window to see if it was still there.

*I have a new client after I found my last one dead. I thought about death a lot and slept a lot afterward. I still keep thinking about my own death-- when? where? how? etc. Morbid I know.

*Jerod and I are officially grown up because... WE BOUGHT LIFE INSURANCE!

Lots of random thoughts I know. I'm thankful for what today will bring, to have my puppy sleeping on my feet, under the table, and wait patiently on the Lord.

dmj.

I heart Raleigh.

Yesterday I went and ran 30 minutes with my friend Nicole Short and another friend of ours Rob Parrish. As we finished our run we passed several houses with families out on the porch, children running in the street playing with a basketball, people lounging in plastic chairs, grills cooking hot dogs, and lot of smiles and laughter.

Later, Jerod and I went downtown to meet up with Nicole and Rob at the Duck and Dumpling, an AWESOME restaurant on Blount St. Jerod and I went there for Valentines Day and our friend Amaris Hames works there as a hostess and food runner. A perfect job for her if you ask me! She's a get-er-done kind of person and her personality draws people in no matter how much you know her. I watched her last night effortlessly greet, seat and make people laugh. She saved us the best seat in the restaurant (in my opinion), in the corner by the window so you can watch everything inside and everything outside.

Jerod and I took the motorcycle last night and I admit I've been trying to get him to get rid of it... and it hasn't worked so far :-) But I remembered why I love it in the summer. Since we didn't go on the interstate I didn't have to wear my big heavy jacket with padding in it, while safe it is SO hot in the summer. As we drove I was texting Nicole and watching all the people. We don't have a big skyline but it is so beautiful at night when you drive over Boylan Bridge.

Here it is at night in the background of the picture. This is from the night Jerod proposed:



I love Raleigh. We're still small but growing. We have great things to do, museums, an arboretum, colleges, churches who are trying to love the city, First Friday, art and music. I love that our city has so many different kinds of people. I love our church, Vintage21. I know Jerod and I are called to live here and serve here. I have so much peace and joy knowing we are called to be here. We can invest here. I desire to have children here and raise them to love God.

*I did not remember where in the Bible these verses were but they were on the screen at church yesterday :-)

Thus says the Lord of hosts, the God of Israel, to all the exiles whom I have sent into exile from Jerusalem to Babylon: Build houses and live in them; plant gardens and eat their produce. Take wives and have sons and daughters; take wives for your sons, and give you daughters in marriage, that they may bear sons and daughters; multiply there, and do not decrease. But seek the welfare of the city where I have sent you into exile, and pray to the Lord on its behalf, for in its welfare you will find your welfare.

Jeremiah 29:4-7

{hummus} is delicious

Yes you too can make hummus! It is so easy! Do you have a food processor? Mine gets used at least once a week. I really try and not buy anything already made... for now this is going well. I'm sure there will be a day where I do not have as much time as I do now. But I'm hoping these good habits now will follow me no matter what.

This hummus is so easy. I threw it together with what I had in the house, I did not have cayenne pepper so I used cumin and I did not have all the herbs in the food network recipe, so I only used a 1/4C parsley. I also used more garlic because I just really like garlic. Really you can do what you want with it. I ate it for a snack with a mini pita pocket from Trader Joe's.

I used these two recipes to get an idea of the ratios:
Green Herb Hummus
Hummus

1 (15 oz) can Harris Teeter brand chickpeas
2 cloves garlic
1/4C parsley leaves
1 tsp honey
2 tbsp tahini paste
juice from half a lemon
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 tsp pepper
1/2 tsp cumin
1/3 C extra virgin olive oil

Place everything in bowl of food processor. I mixed it on low for about a minute. Then stir the bottom and pulse a little more. I did not do this and I had honey at the bottom not fully incorporated.

Then eat with veggies or take a pita, toast it and cut it up for dipping.

Will last about a week (But J and I'll eat it before then!)

dmj

13.1

13.1 miles! That's so many! The most I can run right now is 4. So, I've decided I want to run a half marathon. I was inspired by a really great friend of mine named Nicole Short. She's running one in Seattle, Washington very soon! I am also reading a book called The Non Runner's Marathon Guide for Women. It is hysterical! While I work out and I run I really would like a goal to work towards. So here it goes! I will not actually start the official training until the first week in July. The training takes 19 weeks and the race is at the beginning of week 20.

So why run a half marathon??

Well, to be honest... my first thought was to loose the last pesky 5lbs I carry around and no matter what feel like I can't get rid of. But I feel like working towards a half marathon would give me a goal. I would love to start an finish something, which I have seen in my past that I'm not great at. I feel like the author in The Non Runner's Marathon Guide for Women, I have a hard time finishing what I start. I started at NC State and did not finish and, now I'm working toward nursing. But I won't finish nursing for another two years so until then I would love to commit. Commit to running 13.1 miles, commit to eating better, commit to working towards having a healthy lifestyle.

I also know I could run the risk of becoming consumed? I usually limit myself at the gym to 1 hour. I want to be accountable to still keep priorities straight.

I went through all my "work out" clothes and found I was wearing a majority of pants and shirts make of 100% Cotton. All the research says I should be wearing fabrics that pull the moisture off my body. So I took the opportunity to go to Target and do a little shopping :-) I bought myself two new pairs of polyester/spandex bottoms and 100% polyester shirt. I probably won't look cute running but I'm going to try :-)

I would like to run the half marathon in Raleigh, NC. November 7th is the City of Oaks Marathon and Rex Healthcare Half Marathon. I'm trying to convince my Dad and Mom to do it with me! Jerod thinks I'm crazy, but I'm not done with trying to convince him to do it with me too :-)

So I'm going to keep praying about running it and then hopefully register soon!

dmj.

[thankful heart.]

I realized today that I was washing the SAME load of laundry for the third time. I kept washing it and forgetting to put in the dryer so every couple of days it would stink and I'd have to do it again. Finally today it made it into the dryer smelling like lavender laundry soap not mold.

Some days I'm thankful my head is still attached.

Psalm 95:1-5

Oh come, let us sing to the Lord;
let us make a joyful noise to the rock of our salvation!
Let us come into his presence with thanksgiving;
let us make a joyful noise to him with songs of praise!
For the Lord is a great God,
and a great King above all gods.
In his hand are the depths of the earth;
the heights of the mountains are his also.
The sea is his, for he make it,
and his hands formed the dry land.

Thankful the Lord is greater than my short comings, my hard heart, my sin, my greed, my selfishness, my vanity, my sadness, my fears, and my guilt. Thank you Jesus.

dmj.

"A Conservation Garden"

This past weekend, as a late mother's day get-together, my Nonna, Zia, their friend Barb, mom and I all went to the NC Botanical Gardens. We arrived a little late, but still joined the tour as it was beginning. Our tour guide was a sweet older women named Nell. It was clear early on she LOVED her job. The way she spoke and told us about the different plants really inspired me to learn a little more.

The NCBG is more of a learning experience. It reminded me of the NC Museum of Natural Sciences in DT Raleigh. When I watched the Young kids, I would take Bill here regularly (to see the dinosaurs!). It went through all the different areas of NC, what plants that grew there, type of soil, what animals that lived there etc. For the NCBG soil was brought in from the mountains and the beach. Their goal is to conserve the native plants of North Carolina and demonstrate sustainability (my inner granola like this part)!

It was overcast, so really a great day to take some pictures and enjoy the walk with out feeling like my skin was melting off in the NC heat. My grandmother and aunt LOVED it! Do you have any gardener's in your family?! Take them here. They'll loved it.

The NCBG even has a small area where you can buy some plants you wouldn't find at Lowe's and you just place your money in a box. (They even have Venus Fly Traps for sale!)

Here are some pictures:







dmj.

d.a.t.e. n.i.g.h.t.

Date night! So important! Do you have one if you're married? Jerod and I have date night usually on Wednesday, but sometimes the week gets a little unruly and we have to switch to Friday. BUT no matter what we have one every week. Jerod is a stickler about it and I'm sad to say sometimes I am not as good at protecting our night together.

When we have date night we communicate better, talk about an issue we're having and sometimes we don't talk!

Some great idea:

1. $1.50 movie- Blue Ridge Cinema
2. Barnes and Noble - Jerod and I each buy a book, buy a drink from Starbucks and read
3. Go out to eat- many people do this but J and I don't have a ton of spare money lying around so we will splurge but usually we try and only do this one once a month, my fav right now: The Flying Biscuit
4. Coffee and desert- we LOVE Morning Times in DT Raleigh, a cup of coffee and their chocolate cake are amazing)
5. Eat in- many times I will cook for Jerod and we'll just have a date night at home, eat, talk, rent a movie (or rather receive one from Netflix)

Those are some things we've done and really enjoyed! If you ever have any other ideas for me that's be great!
Here is our most recent date night:

Chicken sausage, onions and peppers, mustard, brioche rolls and BEER! Yum!



dmj.

worship through {suffering}

Last night at C-group we discussed Psalm 22. Pastor Tyler gave a sermon using Psalm 22 discussing worshiping even in suffering. I was encourage by our discussion.

*It was the best discussion we've had in WEEKS and what a blessing. As always you guys challenge me and encourage me. I’m VERY thankful for all of you :-)

Our group thought of great questions:
Who is this God we serve?
If He is good, why is there suffering?
Does God will suffering?
What is the difference, if there is, between God willing suffering and Him allowing it?

We talked about truth. Who is God? What do we know about Him?
He is good and loving. He is worthy of our praise. God loves us so much, He sent Jesus, who experience separation from God and died for our sins.

God does allow suffering!

Romans 5:3-5

More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.

BUT even though we suffer God is faithful.

Romans 8:28

And we know that for those who love God all things work together for God.

I need to remind myself daily that I love and serve a God who does care for me and loved me enough, despite my sin, to send Christ to die for me. I do not have to be separated from God, even when my body physically dies. I can easily get caught in the lie that God is only good when things are going my way. And that's a LIE. God is good all the time, He is faithful and merciful all the time. God works things for good. I see this in my past clearly. I made pour decisions, put my hope in people and dreams other than God, and I suffered the consequences. But looking back I see God's faithfulness. I see where He was chasing after me through scripture, church, family and friends. God was calling me back to Himself. Suffering gives us the opportunity to cling to God in a way we may never have, to trust Him more. Its a challenge, my sin gets in the way. But we serve a God who is greater than my sin, my emotions, my short comings. My heart is thankful this morning for who God is and what that means in my life. hope this is encouraging.

dmj.